Monday, September 30, 2013

Pre-teen Hell

Here it is, Monday morning, and I'm still clinging to the weekend. Last day off on my little mini vacation. Of course, I had the girls this weekend so Saturday and Sunday were less about being a vacation and more about me trying (and failing) not to lose my shit.

Saturday morning, bright and early, I drove down to Topeka since Paige and Elsa were supposed to have a soccer game at 9AM. Well, I didn't get a mile down the road when I got a text from their dad saying the game had been pushed back until noon. Really? I decided to go on ahead because I wanted to take Hannah out for breakfast and then the sky opened up and the torrential downpour began. It poured on me the whole trip to T-town which makes driving that much more fun.

Cordie went with Hannah and I to IHOP and we had a very nice breakfast. They even let me snap a picture, which is rare these days. The restaurant was freezing, as usual. I have yet to be in an IHOP where they don't have the a/c on full blast. I'm like, it is 50 degrees and raining, how about you ease up just a bit, mmmkay?

The rest of the weekend was a blur of constant bickering and me yelling constantly. Between the 13 year old hormones and the pre-teen diva attitudes and the 3 year old in charge of everything, I don't know how I am going to make it the next few years. Cordie always seems to piss off Emmeline who starts screaming, and then Elsa will be mean to Cordie who starts crying. Paige usually tries to stay out of it as she tends to be the peacekeeper, but watch out if she gets pissed.

The worst thing about all of this is that I turn into a different person. I become a raging bitch mom who is constantly yelling. Talking calmly doesn't do jack shit, so let me yell over everyone and lose my cool. I will then unfairly take it out on Jason and he's just trying his best to hide out away from it all. Not my proudest mommy weekend.

I did manage to get all the girls dressed and out of the house on Sunday and took them down to English Landing, which is a really nice park down by the river. Emmeline had been begging to go to the park so she was thrilled. She did her thing on the slides and playground equipment and I noticed that Paige and Elsa had disappeared. I knew exactly where they were, but I was still irritated that they didn't come tell me where they were going. I sent Cordie off in search of them and when she didn't come back, I coaxed Emmeline off of the slide for a bit to go get her sisters. Sure enough, they were by the water's edge, playing with the sand. Everyone was wading ankle deep even though I specifically said "Do Not get in the water".

I had come prepared with towels though, so they dried their feet off and started throwing rocks in the water. Then, Paige and Elsa got a little bolder and started searching for turtles ending up back in the water. I can't win.

After dragging everyone back up to the park, we stopped at the swings which had a big sandpile underneath. Kids' heaven. Once we got back home, I made the three younger girls get in the shower to wash off all the sand and dirt and river water off of them. We had a late lunch and then it was back to their dad's. So, the weekend ended on a high note at least, but I am seriously going to need some Xanax or something to survive the next few years without injuring someone.

Anyone else in pre-teen hell?

Friday, September 27, 2013

Meal Planning for the Win

Today is the first day of my long 4 day weekend and so far I am loving it. I went back to bed after Jason and Emmeline left this morning and slept until noon. Glorious. I do plan on getting my butt in some compression pants and hitting the pavement for a good long(ish) run. I have actually been missing it, crazy as that sounds. I keep having little twinges of pain in my right knee, especially when I go down stairs) so I'm hoping that it won't be an issue.

Jason and I have meal planning for three weeks now and it is going really well. It is amazing how much stress is eliminated when you know exactly what you are going to have for dinner and you know that you have all of the ingredients. We haven't been prepping the meals at the beginning of the week, but that is fine, this works out for us. We decide on the menu and then hit the grocery store to pick up any needed items and then we don't have to stop and pick random stuff up during the week. Here are a few of the recipes that we have had so far.
Chicken Enchilada Soup -
This was delicious and we froze the leftovers to have dinner for the next week.
Tator Tot Casserole -
This was a pinterest find. Not too bad, but the onion soup mix made it really salty
Chicken Cordon Bleu Casserole -
This was very good, but it needed more spice.
We've been watching Game of Thrones via Netflix and I am also trying to read the books simultaneously but am way behind. We just started the second season of the show and I'm still on the first book. I need to catch up now that I finally have extra time to read.

I'm still disappointed that I'm not on my way to Fort Wayne, IN today, but am trying to stay positive. I will be spending the weekend with my girls instead and that is good enough for me. I'll be up nice and early tomorrow morning to drive to Topeka for a 9AM game. Hannah has to work again so I think I'll take her out and get some breakfast, just the two of us.

That's about it for me. I'm off to relax with my coffee and get some reading in. Have a great weekend!

Thursday, September 26, 2013

What's going on

So, I thought I'd give a little update about what's been going on the past couple of weeks. Honestly, it isn't that much. I live a pretty boring life.

This little monkey is just growing up way too fast. Her latest obsession is the Shrek movies. I have all four on DVD and she just rotates watching them. I'm trying to limit her TV time so she doesn't turn into a TV zombie, but she is a creature of routine and wants to watch it every day when we get home. She is learning so much at daycare and it amazes me what different observations she can make. One of her newer teachers asked me yesterday if we were planning on giving her a little brother or sister because she is so good with the younger kids. Um, no. When I explained that she was actually #5 and will remain the baby, I got the usual surprised face and the exclamation that I don't look old enough to have 5 kids. (That seriously never gets old).

Emmeline is very particular about her name, too, which cracks me up. Jason likes to call her Pumpkin as a little nickname and her response is always the same, "I not punkin, I Emmwine!" So cute. I started singing songs to her at bedtime and she expects the songs every single night now. A couple of them are ones that my great-aunt sang to me when I was little and I'm amazed that I still remember them. She will sing along every word with me and it just melts my heart. As long as we keep to the routine, then bedtime is really pretty easy, thank goodness.

Jason's favorite tattoo place, Iron Tiger, was running a special on $13 tattoos for Friday the 13th. Naturally, he took the day off of work so he could drive to Columbia and get a new tattoo. He had a great time and really gets along with all the artists that work there. Plus, he got a fun new tattoo and he's already itching for another one.

His dad and brother were trying to work out a weekend when all three of them could go camping and he was really excited about that. So, of course, it all started to go downhill. First, his dad wanted to get a cabin (um, that's not really camping) then his sister was going to join them (so much for a guy's weekend) then his sister-in-law was talking about coming, then all of a sudden, they had to change the weekend because his dad couldn't get off of work. GAH! Get it together already. Jason was pissed but won't say anything because he doesn't want to ruffle anyone's feathers. I told him to speak up, but we'll see what happens.

For me, work has been rather stressful and I'm trying to get everything caught up before my long weekend. Working out has been non-existent and I've pretty much been Lazy McChubbersons. I weighed in at 153 this morning which I was not happy about. I don't like seeing the number go up instead of down. I discovered that a coworker has a candy drawer that she stocks for the whole team and I have been eating candy like it's going out of style. I need to cut that shit out, especially with Halloween looming on the horizon. Willpower! (I don't have it).

So my goal is to get refocused back on my fitness and staying away from the chocolate. Just because it is getting cooler outside (boo) and I can wear more layers is no excuse to let myself slack and get fat again.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Pity Party

Oh hello there. So what that it has been a week and a half since my last post. (does that feel like confession to anyone else? I'm not even Catholic.) My basic M.O. is that I get really excited about something and I will be into it for a while (the time varies) and then I will get bored or lose interest and it falls by the wayside. I feel like this is happening with my blogging.(Jason told me that he is surprised I've lasted this long. Thanks babe.) It has certainly happened with working out. The thing is, I don't want to quit blogging. I have made some real connections with people and I think it is also very cathartic for me. I can get shit out of my head because goodness knows I won't talk about my feelings out loud. Plus, I just like to know that people want to read what I have to say.

 I have this thing where I am desperate to "belong". I have always wanted to be in the group that was the center of attention. I will get my feelings hurt if I feel that I am left out or not invited to something even if it is completely innocent. Therapy, anyone? I know I need to get over it and stop worrying so much about what others think of me, but it is hard. 

Recently, I had someone who I thought was a friend just cut me out. Stopped texting, calling and emailing and I have no idea why. My first reaction is to withdraw and in turn cut them back (if that makes any sense). If I am feeling butt hurt about something, then I shut others out as well. I've figured out that it is my secret hope that someone will say, "Amanda, where have you been? What's going on? I've missed you." etc. However, I am only hurting myself by doing that. Remove yourself from people's line of vision and they tend to forget about you. No one is going to chase you down. 

So, long story short (too late) is that I am going to try and do a better job of blogging. Hmm, have we heard this before? I just need to make it a priority and I struggle with that. Speaking of making things a priority, exercise has fallen waaaaaay by the wayside. Plus my eating has not been that great so I've put on 5 or 6 pounds and am back in the 150's. I'm not happy about this at all. You'd think that since I had signed up to complete a half marathon this weekend, I would be all about training. Well, I finally came out of my denial state and realized that there is just not a way I'm going to be able to make the trip to Indiana this weekend. Once I accepted that, I became incredibly sad and disappointed and upset and... you get the picture. Why the hell should I workout when I don't have anything to work out for? Cue pity party. 

I am still incredibly disappointed that I won't be going this weekend. Not only because I've already paid for the race and I really wanted to try to PR, but there are so many women going that I wanted to see again or meet for the first time. (Desperate need to be part of the cool club rearing it's ugly head again). So, to all of you who will be running this weekend. I wish you the best of luck and I hope you have a great time. I will not ignore Instagram again and will be cheering you on in spirit.

Instead, I will be taking a couple days off of work (since I asked for them off anyway) and focus on me. I'll lace my shoes back up and hit the pavement. I'll spend some quality time with my daughters and maybe meet up with a new friend. I will not wallow in what I can't have. There is no point and much more joy in cherishing what I do have. Self realization for the win!

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Linking up with the doublemint twins

Not too much going on today so I thought I'd join in on the latest installment of Jake and Holly's Finish the Sentence linkup. You'd think they'd run out of sentences by now. And does anyone else want to go out and buy mint pants to match these two?

My happy place... is out in the sun. I seriously am like a cat, I will find the sunniest spot and just soak it all up. Our house is really dark too, (because Jason is a hermit) so you gotta catch the sun at just the right time. We also have a little group of waterfalls on campus at work that I absolutely love to go and sit by. It just makes me feel peaceful.

Whatever happened to... bathroom privacy. I haven't peed in peace in years. Also, if you go into a public bathroom and there is one occupied stall and nine other empty ones, don't pick the stall right next to the occupied one! Back the fuck off, people! This is a common occurrence at work and it pisses me off every time.

So what if I... signed up months ago to run a half marathon nine hours away from where I live. I don't need to train for it. Pshaw. As NerkyMeg would say, "shit bitch, you is fine".

E! needs a reality show about... is there anything they haven't made a reality show about yet?

My go-to fast food meal is... burger and fries. Why else would I get fast food? To get chicken? Please.

You might not know that I... got to study in France for six weeks during college. One of the best experiences of my life, hands down. Not including the day I was super hungover and got conned into paying 100 francs (this was pre-Euro) for some guy to tie string around a piece of my hair.

The hottest quarterback in the NFL is... don't know, don't care. I don't watch football and neither does Jason so I have absolutely no frame of reference.

If I could... free myself from the belief that I need money to be able to do things to make me happy, I would be a lot happier.

My personality is awesome because... I'm like a ninja. I'm the silent friend that sneaks up on you when you weren't expecting it.

Twerking is... just another weird fad. I'm sure it will go the way of the Macarena eventually.

I think it is super gross when... This is a tough one for me. Not a lot of things gross me out, but I really don't like disembodied eyeballs. Yuck. Or the thought of a bug laying eggs in my ear really skeeves me out. Creepy stuff like that get to me.

Someone needs to tell Miley Cyrus... lose the bears. They are weirding people out.

That's all I've got for today, hopefully I can finally win one of those gift cards. Happy Wednesday!

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Sweating it out

Well, my computer at work is not allowing me to type anything on blogger so I'm doing this post from my iPad. This should be fun. That was also the reason for no post yesterday. I really did have good intentions, but technology thwarted me. That and work. I did think about typing this up last night, which would have been the smart thing to do, but that didn't work out either. I did have a little mini victory with myself, though. I got my ass on the treadmill and ran for a full hour. I did take a couple walk breaks, but I ran the majority. I was so proud of myself since I have been thinking about doing it since last Friday. I just kept making excuses not to. Story of my life.

I decided to drive down to Topeka Saturday to watch Paige and Elsa's first soccer game of the year. This is the first year they're both on the same team. Despite it being hotter than Hades outside, the girls did great and the team won. They play on a coed team and all the kids are very sweet and the coach is great. I had brought Emmeline along with me too, and she kept wanting to go out on the field with her fwiends. 
After the game we went back to my ex's house so the girls could shower and then we were going to head to the mall to visit Hannah at work. Nothing like having your entire family descend on you at work. I was sweating my butt off from being outside and my clothes were soaked. Gross. I ended up snooping around Cordie's room to see what clothes I could borrow. Her room was closer than Hannah's. I actually found a cute tank top from Old Navy (large) and some size 7 jean shorts that I fit into (they were really stretchy). Not a bad little ego boost to fit into your 13 year old's clothes. Or it is sad, I haven't decided which. Sunday was my day of lounge. I did absolutely nothing and only put a bra on to take Emmeline to the park. I kind of wish I had made it to the pool since it was the perfect day for it, but oh well. I had told myself that I was going to get a good run in but that didn't happen either. One thing they did happen was Jason and I actually planned out our meals for the week. This is a big deal as we are the worst planners ever. It is so nice to know exactly what we are going to cook and we don't have to have that dreaded conversation every damn night. Winning!

Friday, September 6, 2013

Sunshine and Rainbows

Okay, so maybe not the rainbows part so much, but I was nominated by two very awesome ladies for the sunshine award. Just in time, too, because I was really starting to get that "nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I'll go eat worms" feeling. I don't know why, other than I am neurotic.

Anyway, the rules of the award are as follows:
The award is circulated to those bloggers to let them know that their posts brighten your day.

1. Include the award logo on your post or blog
2. Link to the person who nominated you - Marcy and Kate
3. Answer 10 questions about yourself.
4. Nominate 10 bloggers to receive the award. Link your nominees in your post and leave them a comment letting them know that they have been nominated.

Alright, let's get started. My first questions are from Marcy at The Mustache Diaries.
1. What is your biggest fear? This is a tough one. Other that something awful happening to my kids or Jason or siblings, there isn't a lot that I'm afraid of. If I want to get all deep, then I would have to say I have a fear of not being good enough.

2. What is one item you couldn't live without on a daily basis? Hand soap. I absolutely hate having dirty hands. I do not like hand sanitizer, though.

3. Have you ever been arrested? Yes, you can read more about that here.

4. What is your favorite thing to pass the time? Reading. I don't get to read nearly often enough.

5. Do you collect anything? Not really, although I do have a lot of coffee mugs.

6. How did you get started in blogging? I spent several months reading all of Mama Laughlin's old posts (stalker) and then I got introduced to Skinny Meg and Holly and thought that it was something I wanted to try. A year later, here I am. Jason never thought I would stick with it this long.

7. Do you have a lead foot when you drive? ABSOLUTELY I despise slow drivers and there are an abundance of them in KC. If we have driven on the same highway, then I've probably yelled at you and called you names. Sorry about that.

8. What is one movie you could watch on repeat and recite all the words to? Do I have to pick just one? Top 5 would be Clue, The Sandlot, Princess Bride, Coming to America and Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

9. What is the worst present you have ever received? I really can't think of one!

10. Do you like me? =) Of course! I love your energy and your honesty and your 'don't give a shit' attitude.

Now, on the cutest of the cute, Kate
1. What is your personality type? I took the Myers Briggs once and I believe I am ENTP. I can't remember exactly though. Basically, I love to be around people and I think I am friendly. I'm usually quiet in a group, as I like to hear what everyone has to say.

2.What is the hardest thing you've ever had to do? Giving up custody of my kids

3. What's in your car's trunk? I have an SUV so I don't have a trunk, but in the back there are reusable grocery bags (that I inevitably forget), paper towels, a blanket and a car kit bag.

4. How many times have you been to Disney World or Disney Land? I have been to Disney World exactly one time. I was 18 and I went with my parents and siblings. It was a lot of fun, but for some reason I skipped the day that they actually went to the theme park. Moody teenage hormones. I would love to be able to take the girls someday, but when you have 5 kids, things get kind of pricey.

5. What's one thing you've been putting off? Besides blogging? Training for this half marathon. I am so behind and it is going to bite me in the ass big time. I don't know why I think I can always wing these things.

6. What do you have going on this weekend? Absolutely nothing and it is glorious. I'm looking forward to just relaxing and I might get Pinspirated to get shit done around the house.

7. Wine, Beer or mixed drinks? For me, it is usually wine or beer and I'm pretty split down the middle. I love sweeter wines and will not drink cheap beer. I'm well past the point where I drink to get shitfaced so I buy beer that has flavor and that I can enjoy. Leinenkugel's is probably my favorite brand. Their Lemon Berry Shandy is so good.

8. If you had to legally change your name, what would you choose? Hmm, I always thought I could use Miranda Sweeney as an alias because it was close enough to my real name that I wouldn't get confused, but I really do love the name Delaney.

9. What cheesy line do you tell yourself to get motivated for a workout/run/whatever? Nothing cheesy, I just basically have to be a hard ass. I let myself off the hook for things way too easily.

10. Bill Murray or Will Ferrell? Bill Murray all the way, baby

So, there you have it. Now, here are my 10 questions for my wonderful nominees.
1. What is your greatest accomplishment?
2. Manicures or do your own nails?
3. Do you play any musical instruments?
4. If you had to be in a talent show, what would be your talent?
5. What is your favorite board game?
6. Where do you rank in birth order with your siblings (if any)?
7. What is the one city you want to visit before you die?
8. Solids or prints?
9. What is your go-to recipe for a potluck?
10. If you could win a $5000 gift card, which store would it be for?

And the nominees are:
Jodi from Love and Crayons
Meredith from Is This Thing On
Darci from Strongly Feminine
Ashley from Iseminger Chronicles
Ashleigh from Life in Bloom
Jenn from FatChick2FitChick
Lori from FattoFit41 
Taylor from Tay LeMay
Meghan from NerkyBlog
Alicia from BrewMama

Have a great weekend everyone!

Thursday, September 5, 2013

Worst Blogger Ever

It is Monday, right? No, it's Thursday. Shit. Well, how about a week recap instead a weekend? I've actually had a pretty busy week, hence the lack of posting. Work has been ridiculous to the point that I don't have time to write in the morning. I guess busy is good, though. It means that I won't get bored. Just annoyed by stupid questions.

Last Saturday was a lot of fun and a day spent with my family. Saturday morning, I got up early because I needed to make the food dishes I was bringing, plus get in a little cleaning. I got a little overzealous with the vacuuming and ended up moving the couch and vacuuming under it as well as the entire upstairs. Having thrown off my schedule already, I also squeezed in a short run. I barely had time to finish the jalapenos and jump in the shower when I had to leave to meet my ex to get the girls (Hannah had to work Friday night) and then swing back by the house to grab Jason and Emmeline and head over to my aunt and uncle's house.

Being the bad blogger I am, I took absolutely no pictures at the family gathering. I didn't even get my phone out, but that's how it should be, right? I really enjoyed visiting with my sister and brother in-law and my nephew is the cutest. He is 17 months old and you can tell that he is going to be ornery.
Adorable family
After getting home and resting for a bit, we headed out to Target. Elsa and Cordie had gift cards burning holes in their pockets and they could wait to spend the money. I found a couple pairs of shorts for Em on clearance and then got some more sunscreen and managed to make out of there spending under $30. Win.

Sunday, I took my birthday girl, Elsa, to Build-A-Bear to pick out something as promised. She chose a Hello Kitty doll with an outfit from Justice that matched an outfit she already had at home. Again, no picture. Terrible.  We then picked up the rest of the girls (minus Emmeline) and hit up the local thrift shop because Hannah wanted to look for some pants for work. I actually found several cute things including a dress that I'm still not 100% about. Then it was Sonic drinks for everyone and swimming the rest of the day.

I did grill up some Brats and chicken for dinner, which were delicious, and while I was grilling, some of our neighbors behind us were outside with a couple friends talking and laughing. I expected maybe a wave or hi, how are you, but I got nothing. I might as well have been invisible. Maybe I was putting off an unfriendly vibe? Or maybe I just have dick neighbors. Who can tell?

After I took the girls back, I took PeeWee to the pool. She had a little life jacket on and was having a ball jumping in the pool until she got crazy and jumped on my head. I was about done at that point. Jason (best boyfriend ever) came and took her home and let me sit at the pool all by myself. It was relaxing and glorious.

I am so ready for the weekend again. The past couple of days have been stressful at work followed by getting home late, cleaning the kitchen, making dinner, giving Em a bath, working from home and very little me time. I want to get some more running in, but I'm not pushing it. If I do end up running at the Fort4Fitness half, I'm sure I'll be slogging through another 3 hours trying to get to the finish line. "Just start drinking without me, guys. I'll catch up with you later".

The lovely Marcy from Mustache Diaries nominated me for a Sunshine Award, so I'll be back tomorrow with that. Cheers!